This morning, the market is once again flying out of control, which, interestingly, somehow turned my attention from it right onto me, and it is stuck. Perhaps it is time for me to spend some time looking and thinking about me. Perhaps, snapping my focus from the market turmoil to my own is the mind’s way to say, “Protect and preserve yourself.” Yes, maybe I need to pay attention because I am struggling on all fronts.
You see, the last few months have been difficult ones. Like many, I have struggled with the market, but that is just a piece of my being, as what we do is only part of who we are. Another important piece of ourselves is our personal side, the side with relationships and quality of life issues. Along with my market struggles, I have had struggles in this area as well. When these two pieces of ourselves are in turmoil, every day is a struggle. Every day is a battle for stability, a steady fight to find respite from the symptoms of unease.
Yes, uneasy is the word that best describes my state. I am not specifically ill, nor has any major catastrophe befallen me, or anyone I care about. Simply, I am in flux. I am changing just about everything on the personal side, and that is never easy. My life on the ranch is ending. This is my choice. Making that choice, however, has come with numerous ramifications that have taken some months to work out and will take some months more to complete the process.
Hmmm … This is the second time I have read this word (process) this morning. I also came across it in TraderPlanet’s Synergistic Newsletter. In the lead article from Dr. Van Tharp, “A Trading Reality Check,” he says,
Life is a process. There is no success or failure—only feedback.
Yes, I agree that “life is a process,” but I am not sure I agree that life is only about feedback. Both the notions of success and failure are integral to defining who we are and how we behave as well. For example, if you continually fail at trading, and you lose all of your money, you should quit trading. Now, one could argue that the failure was the feedback, but, in truth, that is just semantics. The fact is you failed and you should accept that reality and move on. Just let it go and move on. The converse is true in the example above. If you continually win, accept that as success, which will breed confidence and further success.
Okay, so I am moving on, but not with a sense of failure, even though I am struggling. No, my life on the ranch was an unqualified success. I grew in so many ways. My life on the ranch was full of both feedback and success. I became a trader, a professional writer, a horseman, an animal lover. I learned to listen to the birds, feel the wind, watch the sky, and follow the tracks. I learned how to be quiet, to be still. I learned how to clear my mind when unease set in.
Now that I’ve written about this, I feel some ease from my struggle. Yes, the words flowing from my head to this screen are clearing my mind, at least for a bit, anyway. Maybe I’ll take a look at the market.
Trade in the day – Invest in your life …
